Crimson Solace

This Ain’t A love Song – Bon Jovi

2009-02-15T02:38:00.000-08:00

I was reaaaaaly bored today, and was wandering around the internet, and saw this on facebook, I have done this before, but I thought, what the heck, it's not like I have anything better to do, so here goes :D

RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
I Hate Everything About You – Three Day’s Grace

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Lonely - Akon

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GIRL?
Wasting Time - Red

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Friends Don’t Let Friend’s Dial Drunk – Plain White T’s

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Chapter One - Lifehouse

WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
Strange and Beautiful - Aqualung

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
This Ain’t A Scene, It’s An Arms Race – Fall Out Boy

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Gone Forever – Three Days Grace

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Hand Of Blood – Bullet For My Valentine

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Lucifer’s Angel – The Rasmus

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Adrienne – The Calling

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Careless Whisper – George Micheal

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Same Direction - Hoobastank

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Suddenly I See – KT Tunstall

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Don’t Cry – Guns and Roses

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Till I Collapse - Eminem

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST??
Fighter – Christina Aguillera

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Why Me - Shaggy

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Superman – Five For Fighting

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
The Joke - Lifehouse

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Bonanza (Belly Dancer) - Akon

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
This Ain’t A love Song – Bon Jovi

Level's Of Love

2009-02-11T07:06:00.001-08:00

The word love is certainly one word that will be in any language, and if they don’t, it is truly a sad society that they live in. Love is a word with a multitude of meanings, and perhaps one with no meaning at all. It has a million and one uses, and everyone uses and accepts this word in a different way. We jest with it; we show our affection with it, we show our gratitude with it and perhaps many more.

“I love you”, is perhaps one of the phrases that can have the greatest effect on one’s life. To hear it may consequence of feelings of, gratitude, happiness, jealously, hatred and perhaps even nothing at all. Today a lot of people are talking about types of love, I love you this way, I don’t love you that way. I think some people even consider sexual attraction as love, but just because you want to make out with someone or maybe even do more than that, doesn’t mean you are in love; it just means your hormones are on the fritz. But in my opinion, there are stages or levels of love, and once you fit those criteria there is no type of love. Below are what I deep to be the levels of love;

Friends: Simple friendship is the most common and simplest forms of love. The people included in this level are those who you generally meet but are not a big part of your life, classmates, co-workers, neighbours etc that you are on speaking terms with. You are not generally on close personal terms with them, you don’t really trust them, but you don’t distrust them either. You may not go to great lengths to be helpful to them or watch their back, but you will help them out if it’s not too inconvenient for you. You know what kind of people they generally are, but it’s not like we go sharing our deepest secrets with them either. This love is fragile and easy broken, it wouldn’t take much for one to doubt or turn on the people in this category. But we do love our friends, to some extent.

Best Friends: These are the friends who we have close personal bonds with, you know almost everything there is to know about them, and they know what is to know about you. You trust them with your secrets and in their actions. They are the people who you go for advice to and for help on your endeavours. Usually people have a very limited number in this category; two or three people or perhaps even one. You will generally go out of your way to help them out, and your life is greatly affected by your interaction with them. People do not easily turn on those who they truly consider best friends, and are reluctant to believe any outside comments they may hear. We all love our best friends, but we don’t say it, mostly because it sounds really gay. But we all know it, and once in a blue moon, we even say it.

Family: Family bonds are the hardest to describe. Apart from the fact that its one`s own flesh and blood, how much we love them also depends on many other circumstances. Some relatives may just be our friends, while others maybe our best friends. The bond of blood normally doesn’t hold when considering every relative, one may easily chose his best friend over a cousin or uncle. Blood is in this case insignificant without friendship. However when it comes to the immediate family; Mother, Father, Brother or Sister, in the very end, we do love them more than our friends, especially our parents. We may not know there history or they may not know every secret we have, but in this case the bond of flesh and blood does prevail in most cases over friends.

Love: I think this is the stage most of us ever reach in our lifetime; maybe some of us don’t even believe that there is something above it. This is the love that we feel for our significant others, for that someone special. Although many a people have argued, I do not believe you can love two people this way at the same time. You will love one person more, even if that choice is hard to make. This love is what makes us want to spend as much time we can with that person, the need to go that little extra mile, the need to show we care, the need to be loved. We trust this person to a great extent, we tell this person we love them, and we expect love in return. We expect the person to love us, to be with us, to hold us dear. You would go to a good extent to keep the person happy and be with the person. Although this love is not easily discarded, it goes away with lack of mutual love, trust and even by the bad decisions and actions of the other. One of the main fuel of this love, is to be happy while been with the significant other and making that person happy.

True Love: In this world of cynicism there is an only a handful of people who believe that true love even exists, I am one of them. To love someone with everything you have, beyond with just wanting to be with her. This is a rare occurrence, to selfishly love someone, to want most in the world to keep that person happy. Sometimes a person is so important and loved; the only way to keep them in your life is not to be with them in the usual way when one loves someone. Rather than ranting on let me say something that I may have perhaps even said in a previous post. To truly love someone, is to love her, for all her good, and for all her bad, and ask for nothing to change. To truly love someone, is to be happy that she is happy, to not just simply want to be with her, but to take her happiness as your own happiness. It is to really want to put your well been on the line, if it is to protect her. To think of a life without her in it and to know how empty it would be, to want to do anything and everything you can to keep her in your life, even if it means to never have her as your own. To put up with sorrow you may feel or wrong that may come to you. This is the kind of person you would trust with anything, the kind that would take something of great magnitude to turn your back to.

Undying, Unconditional Love: Whatever many things I maybe, I am no fool, even though I have included this category I do not believe it exists. Love fades, even true love fades. I am not saying it is doomed to fade from the start, I am saying it can fade. To love someone in this way, is to love them forever, despite all odds, despite all hardships, all sorrows, and wrong doings, to love them no matter how shitty or crappy it gets. This is simply not possible, no matter how you love them, even if you truly love them, we all have our limits, and there is only a certain amount of abuse to our life we can take. The threshold may be very high for some of us, but it is still there. You may truly love two or three people in your lifetime, but you cannot love one person forever despite how bad it gets. Again I am not saying you cannot love one person forever, or that it is highly likely that you can’t love one person forever. You just can’t love someone forever unconditionally, without getting any love and happiness and just getting wrong doings in return.

``When I saw you, I was afraid of meeting you.
When I met you, I was afraid of kissing you.
When I kissed you, I was afraid to love you.
Now that I love you, I'm afraid of losing you`` - Anonymous

New Year's Resolution

2008-12-30T18:14:00.000-08:00

It’s been more than a month since I posted anything here. It’s not that I have been busy, just because I don’t have internet connection at my house yet; I’ll have to wait till tomorrow even to post this article.

My first month in Malaysia has really been pretty boring. I arrived on the morning of the 28^th; 24 hrs without a minute of sleep, now I know what Bauer feels like. We took a taxi from the airport to our hotel; we been me, mum, dad, sister, aunt and my cousin. Yup, a big group, we were all making a holiday out of my move to Malaysia. The taxi ride took about an hour, this I enjoyed; riding on the open road, seen a new country, seen the world famous twin towers in the distance. Kuala Lumpur wasn’t really that much different from some other cities I have been. The roads, the buildings, they all looked pretty much just like any other big city in Asia. Only those two towers in the horizon stood as a testament to the fact that I was indeed in Malaysia.

We stayed in serviced apartment building/hotel called Holiday Villa Apartment Suites. The lobby was small but very nice. But they made us wait an hour or so before we could go to our suite; something about the check in time of the hotel. The suite was nice, two rooms, one bathroom, a nice sitting room and a small attached kitchen area. The balcony had a nice view of the twin towers.

That night we went to the base of the Twin towers as it was very near to where we were staying. The towers were beautiful, all lit up. I did take pictures, but I think I am going to wait till I get my own internet connection to post them.

I did have internet connection at the hotel, but most of the time we were out, or dad was the one using it. December 10^th was the date that I had to go to the University, so the days before that were mostly spent at shopping centres like KLCC, Mega mall, Loyat etc...But this was mostly because our group was mostly of the female variety and all they wanted to do was shop. For god’s sake it’s a whole new country, and all you can think about is whether that hand bag or shoes will look good with your new dress? I sometimes watched movies, sometimes wandered around looking for cool stuff. I watched Quantum of Solace (Pretty good), Twilight (this one was just to say Hah Hah to all those lady friends back at home) and Body of lies (a little above boring).

Another thing I did was go with my dad to an area called Gombak, to find a place of accommodation for me. It wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be. But finally it was decided that an apartment would be rented in my name, and I would find someone to share it with. Oh ya, I am looking for an apartment mate by the way, any help in this matter would be very much appreciated. Anyway an agreement was made with a landlord of an apartment called Idaman Putri to rent out a 3 room apartment to me (Even though three rooms I just need one roomie, the extra room is uuh lets say a guest room), however the apartment will be available only from January 16^th onwards.

So when it was finalised that I would get an apartment only on January 16^th, we moved out of the hotel suite (Mainly because we were running up a hell of bill there). We found an apartment in the same condo that I was scheduled to move into. This apartment was fully furnished an available on a day rent basis. It was actually better than the hotel room except for one thing. One CRUCIAL thing; you guessed it. No INTERNET, that’s like telling me I’m going to have to use a crutch for a while; not impossible but DAMN DAMN hard. And mobile internet been pretty expensive here, even that isn’t really a viable option.

After this came the really boring part, been stuck at home with nothing to do, just watching TV; and most of the time there was nothing good on it. Soon people started leaving as the holiday they had taken from work came to an end. First my aunt and her daughter left, then my dad and sister; now it’s just my mother and me, she will most likely leave in January. It was sad to see them leave, no tears were shed, but I certainly was very sad to see them go, and I know they were too.

Soon university classes started, and I met some Maldivians. A lively bunch, moderately lively hehe. The courses seem okay, law so far seems interesting, sometimes a bit try, but fine overall. There are some administrative issues I don’t like about the university, but I think pretty much everywhere it’s like that. I really haven’t made any Malaysian friends, except just this one kid. He seems okay, we just disagree on something’s. He thinks that we should totally concentrate on studies right now and forget about things like girlfriends and friends. Girl friends I kinda understand, but to put friends in that category is a bit too much.

This guy seems like an ambitious person, and I think he comes from a successful family, especially a father that expects something great from him. Anyone who really knows me knows that I am a very ambitious person. Even I myself on many occasions consider myself as over ambitious. But I wonder what over ambitious really means; is it to set ones goals above that which can be reasonably achieved, or is it place ones ambitions over everything else? My new Malaysian friend said that we can concentrate on this today, and later when we are 28 or something then we can find people. I know this is what a lot of people say’s, not just him. But this was the same thing I was told when I was in O’ levels and even in A’ levels. “Son, worry about this right now, you will have plenty of time to worry about everything else once this is over”. But “this” is never over, there is always a new “this”, and if you keep concentrating on just “this”, the rest of the world may pass you by; it won’t wait for you to finish “this”.

I am an ambitious person, a VERY ambitious person, I don’t see that changing. But I cannot give my whole life to it. I won’t sacrifice my other pursuits for it, my friends, or love or anything. True, sacrifices will need to be made to achieve one’s ambitions; however there is a line and one must make a choice which side of the line one wants to be on. Me? I am gonna be on the line, I will find some way to get what I want, I am going to stop concentrating on just “this” and go out there and get what I want. I am going to fulfill my ambitions while at the same time holding on to friends or love.....somehow I will do it. Consider that my new year’s resolution.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009 EVERYONE!!!

“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, Like diamonds, we are cut with our own dust.” – Duchess of Malfi (1623), Act V, Scene V by Jhon Webster

I Wont See You Tonight

2008-11-28T07:49:00.000-08:00

It has always been my philosophy, my belief, that life is all about actions and consequences, the decisions we make, and how we live with those decisions. And every once in a while, we face decisions that define the rest of our lives. We make a choice that changes who we become, what kind of life we will live. Those actions make us into who we are today. I have faced one such fork in my road of life, though that choice I made did not end well, I do not regret making it, it was good while it lasted, and in the end I believe it made me a better person. And today, I again find myself at such a point in life, something that will most definitely change the rest of my life. Right now I am in an aeroplane, on my way to Kuala Lampur, Malaysia. At the moment we have made a pit stop at the Sri Lankan airport, and to my great pleasure, they have FREE WIFI, so I will try my best to wrap this up before the plane takes off.

This day has been in the making for quite some time now, and I have been telling everyone, that I am happy to leave, and that I won’t really miss a thing from home, and that really was how I felt, WAS been the key word there. A lot of my friends, especially Areej tried to convince me that I would in fact be missing Maldives, but I really didn’t see it that way. And that was how it was as months turned into weeks, and weeks into days until finally it was 48 hrs for me to leave. On that day before my departure, I got up as usual, not really feeling any sadness or anything, but that morning as I was in a taxi listening to some songs, the random shuffler on my iphone, brought up the song that pulled me into reality. Avenged Sevenfold’s I Won’t see you tonight Part 1. It’s not really a song about leaving like this, it’s really a song about suicide, but when the song was over, it was as if everything had crashed down on me. I was leaving, and I wouldn’t be back for a really long time. Then everything I saw, reminded me of something, of some distant memory, of a strange reality that I wouldn’t see those places and those faces for a long time.

It’s not really about family, family has been there my entire life, and I am sure they will still be the same even when I come back, it’s more about friends, and how they will change in my absence. It’s about the uncertainty of it all, about the friends, and possible lovers, about leaving them all. It’s about what could have been. About what I may be missing by leaving.

As the ferry took off from Male’ I looked at two of my closest friends who had come to see me off, looking at that knowing that I would not meet them again in person for a very long time. They smiled and waved, so did I, but my heart was filled with grief. And as the ferry started off towards the airport I looked at the buildings, each one a reminder, I looked at the building housing the Hulhumale’ ferry terminal, reminding me of my class reunion at Sea House, and the breakfast during Ramadan, and the recent diner I had at Ocean Breeze. I looked at the building that previously housed the Nasandhra Palace hotel, which had welcomed me for countless parties.

Arriving at the last moment at the airport, I was soon in the plane, ready for take-off. And as the world around me soon started moving as the plane started for its ascend, the sadness I felt, was almost as great as climax that resulted from the last life changing choice I made.

Today was a day I had been looking forward to so many years, it was a dream come true, a start of a new life, but yet, it was not like what I imagined. I never thought it would feel so sad to leave Maldives, because Malaysia, as far as I heard, was a much better place. And right now sitting here in my hotel room, completing this post, I know why. No matter how good this place is, it isn’t home. Who is going to call me about every interesting that happens now? Who will I call when I get bored? Who will call to talk about the latest series? Who will I hang with that I can relate to, and who really know me? I think I will even remember and cherish those most irritating days at work.

The beginning of this year left me shattered and broken, and it took me all I had to fight through that. And it was because of my most dear friends that I grew stronger through it. Without them I would probably still be sulking around in my room. Thank you all so much for that. It took a while, but life was finally picking up in Maldives, I had good friends, a good amount of cash (although yes, if I had stayed in Male’ I would have changed jobs), and maybe even a girl I was starting to like very much after quite sometimes. As I said, it’s all about what could have been, what would have all those things become if I had stayed? And will they all still be there when I come back? Will I be forgotten? Maybe even replaced? I know that my closest friends will welcome me with open arms when I come back, but things change, stuff happen. I will be hanging with them, and they will be talking about stuff I know nothing about because I was not there.

I all ready miss you all very much, (probably even more once my parents leave) playing video games, dining at restaurants, hanging out, throwing parties that really didn’t hit it off (well at least I met someone interesting there). Every little thing, both the good and the bad. And even though I won’t see you tonight, I will NEVER forget you all.

Thank you for everything.

Patriot

2008-11-11T02:41:00.000-08:00

Today is a historical day for our country, the end of a 30 year old regime. But this post is not about how bad or good this change will be. Its about something I realized about myself, something that today I have accepted.
Patriotism has existed for a long time, people have achieved greatness in its name, while others have used it as an excuse to commit great atrocities, perhaps even convince themselves that those acts were needed.
Patriotism in essence means to love once country above all others. Above a specific government, above one's family, one's friends even one's self. But I wonder is it worth it to sacrifice even one's own family for the good of one's country. Its a different story if these people were acting directly against the country, but to simply hold the well been of the one's you love below ones country.
Today in this day of change, I have met different types of people, people who supported this change, people who accepted it, people who were willing to give it a try, and people who were "The new president is walking, he is the devil himself for doing that". I truly am not exaggerating about the last part, maybe not those exact words, but the same context had been used.
And what did I feel? Nothing...not a damn thing, not sad, not angry, not happy. And seen these people I have both decided and realized something, I love my country, I have I believe it can be so much better. And I truly hope that the new regime can achieve that. I never have and never will swear my allegiance to any government. I am a patriot, I have known this for sometime, but that word was hard to accept seen how it is used these days. I don't know how far I can carry that flag, above who all I can love my country, but I will give it my best try. I hope to achieve something great someday, and till then I will be watching, in hope that this country is now changing the better.

"Gentlemen may cry, Peace, Peace — but there is no peace. The war is actually begun! The next gale that sweeps from the north will bring to our ears the clash of resounding arms! Our brethren are already in the field! Why stand we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!" - Patrick Henry

"Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the President or any other public official save exactly to the degree in which he himself stands by the country. It is patriotic to support him insofar as he efficiently serves the country. It is unpatriotic not to oppose him to the exact extent that by inefficiency or otherwise he fails in his duty to stand by the country." - Theodore Roosevelt

Dreams of a Monster

2008-11-02T08:38:00.000-08:00

It seems this is the story that won out based on ratings. So here goes. I have written a chapter two for the story. Its not short, this story is in no way short. But I hope you like it.

Here's the Link

www.crimsontales.blogspot.com

The Minds of Men

2008-10-22T23:00:00.000-07:00

Some say that people are generally bad, that they are rotten in the inside. Others say that they are good, that they can find goodness in the hearts of everyone. But the truth is, people are just stupid, they are neither good nor bad, just really stupid. Especially Maldivians.
We demand the luxury’s that the world has to offer, yet we are not willing to lift a finger to earn it. We rather blame others then work for what we want. Recently I herd something someone said. The inhabitants of a small island had been relocated to a bigger island due to some reasons. And one woman was saying “We had to leave a lot of our things in the island when we moved, and they are still in the island. We are just a few people, and so there are only a few things, even with the normal sea vessels we have, it can be brought in just two trips, but still the government has not brought the stuff for us”. This really shows what kind of people we are. Yes, I agree, if the government did move you, they are obliged to bring your stuff for you too. But, that doesn’t mean you keep on waiting till they do it for you. Its not like you were moved to the other side of the country. As you said, you guys could easily do it yourself. So what are you waiting for? Why don’t you do it? Simply as a matter of principle? That the government HAS to do it?
As I see it these days, what many, Maldivians want to do is just sit back and relax in there houses while the government does EVERYTHING for them. And there are people actually promoting this bull shit, and more importantly people believing it. As I said before, stupid.
A friend of mine said, places like Malaysia and Singapore got there independence around the same time as us, but look at how much they have developed, and look at us. True, but you cannot compare us to them; just getting independence isn’t a corner stone for development. Those countries were better known to the world, were bigger, and had more resources and people then us. Especially people. We think a country is who ever is at the top, the leaders; true they play an important role, but a country is its people. The people of those countries worked hard to achieve that development they had. There was once a time that even us Maldivians were like that. That the people of islands worked together, that they themselves were the people who built there infrastructure and worked hard for development. But then came along the people who claimed that was all wrong. That no one should have to lift a finger. And now that’s all we want to do, we say we want this and that, and then we wait for some government contractors of some foreign country to do it for us. Many say that the development this country has seen in the past years would have occurred over natural course no matter who was ruling. I am not hear to ay anything to that. But I know that we would have progressed even further if we hadn’t stopped believing that it was our own right and responsibility, as much as it is the governments to develop this nation. I don’t believe it will really make much of a difference in the lines of development and progress no matter who is ruling if we don’t realize that.
Democracy is a nice word, it has been plastered all over the media in many different forms, modern democracy, true democracy etc etc… Especially I have herd a lot that we are working towards a modern democracy, to be on par with the “leaders” of democracy in the world. But you know what? Following some other countries, norms and values isn’t a democracy, its something like copying off a test paper. I think most of us have forgotten that very famous phrase regarding democracy; “for the people, by the people, from the people”. A democracy is whatever we want it to be, within acceptable norms of human society and our religion. We do not have to follow some countries way of life saying that they are the so called leaders of democracy.
If you truly want this country to develop, know that you will have to play a part in that. If you want your life to be better, know that you will have to work to achieve that. It’s just stupid to believe that, someone else has to do everything for you. The government has its responsibilities, and so do you. As long as you can’t accept that, this country wont get much better, no matter who’s at the top.

Crimson Tale

2008-10-20T01:39:00.000-07:00

I always liked writing stories, so i thought I'd give it a try. Below is a link to my blog Crimson Tale.

Crimson Tale

It currently has the Prologue of two stories:
Dreams of a Monster: This is a I guess fiction type story, read it and you'll understand what I mean. I don't want to give too much away.

In Your Memory: This story is more real life, as you can probably guess by reading the prologue its a love story.

I have made it so that my readers can rate the two prologues, I don't intend to continue both the stories. I'll leave the prologue there for a while, and continue which ever gets a higher rating.

I've Been Tagged....

2008-10-19T12:02:00.000-07:00

Ok now its my turn....well here goes..

1. what's ur latest addiction? 24 (the series rocks)
2. what are u listening to? Gary Jules - Mad World (nice song, herd it from the series Jericho)
3. how late did u stay up last night n why? slept around 12, I was reading the book twilight....yes the same one for which a movie is gonna be released soon)
4. who were u with last friday night? I am not sure...but i think I was alone at home
5. do u think u'll be in a relationship 3 months from now? They way things are right now, I am pretty sure I wont be in one
6. when is the next time u'll see ur close friends? tomorrow probably
7. what were u doing this morning at 7am? getting ready to go to work
8. what radio station do u listen to the most? hmmmm don't really listen to much radio....but dhiFM i guess
9. what was the reason u last cried? cox I remembered some stuff....that's as much as i am gonna tell :P
10. have u ever talked to someone when they were high? ya mi hisaabuganduga ulheyne payteyn...somethimes they say stuff like "Part liteh nehtha, partu gadin kihaaireh tha"XD....well i guess answering them isnt actually talking
11. what's the fifth text in ur inbox say? I have three active e-mail accounts:P....heres one from my personal account "Account Activation"....hehe not really interesting huh
12. where was the last coffee shop u went to? where?....kinda stupid question aint it....rite here in male' of course:P
13. what's ur outfit right now? dark orange long-sleeved t-shirt and faded blue jeans
16. what were u doing at 11pm last night? hmmmm reading twilight
17. who was the last person u talked to last night before bed? my mum
18. will u be driving in a year? that's what I am hoping for
19. is there anything that u are craving right now? ya a good beef steak...I am always kinda craving for that XD
20. when did ur last hug take place? I actually dont remember....ya that loong :|
22. have u ever started a sentence with "No offense, but..."? nah not really, but i rarely mean to offend anyone....my friends know that
23. Do u drink tea? a lot, i like tea....especially lemon tea
24. have u ever been arrested? no.....but mite be a good experience XD hehe...just kidding
25. have u rode in someone else's car today? does a taxi count?
26. have u made a mistake this past week? the past week no.....but i might have made one tonight....not sure yet
27. who was the last person u texted? a friend
28. are u happy with ur life right now? I've been happier
29. in the past 72 hr have u been under the influence of sleep? ofcourse
30. what's the connection between u and the last person u texted? close friend

I wud really like to know who came up with this, also I would ask him or her to learn to count:P....well anyway I tag Darky and Arky.....haha that rimes XD

I just liked the photo...thats all....

Ambigram

2008-10-14T09:45:00.000-07:00

Above is an ambigram, I made this for two reasons. One, as a tribute my newest best friend, shau :)....and secondly, to see if someone will be stupid enough to try and push copy right infringement for me doing this. This is solely my work, it took my about 45 minutes to come up with the disign and a lot of time to do the editing, it reads HUSHAMSHAU, ya i knowthe a and m is a bit hard to read, but if u look at it as separate letters...you can read it nicely. Well hope shau...and others like this too.....below is a flash animation of the image rotating.

Memories....

2008-10-09T14:11:00.000-07:00

Its 2 AM and I am pretty sure I am the only one up in my house, I went to sleep, but I couldn't, so I thought maybe I'd write this post that I have been meaning to write.
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There he was, happily climbing up the stairs, thinking of the latest good events in his life, when it suddenly hit his ears. A certain song, coming from a television set from one of the apartments, and it was if the whole world suddenly shattered, memories came rushing in as if a dam broke. In essence they were not unhappy memories, but time and circumstances, had made them so.

Aren't memories a strange thing? In life we go through so much, so many adventures, so many happiness, so much grief....so many memories. We remember so much, yet we forget so much. They say that time heals all wounds, but does it truly?...do we really forget? Many a times do we find memories we had thought long buried, memories that we judged to no longer matter rush back into our minds, filling us with momentary happiness, or grief.

People say, always remember the good, think of the happy times, not the sad, the good that happens, not the bad. But that's the thing about memories, they aren't really happy or sad, they are just memories. The ones that once let you sleep peacefully at night, may soon become the ones that keep you up. The happy times that you spend with that someone special, may become memories of sadness and regret. All those speeches of love and sacrifice may turn into what keeps you up at nights, and at times darken your heart. The memories of once endured hardships and embarrassments may today make you laugh and feel happiness.

In life we laugh, we grieve, we cry, we enjoy....we love....and then what?....we forget?...No we don't....we remember. I am told that if one can truly come to terms with everything that happens, we will generally have happy memories. But how many of us has that luxury? To be truly at peace. But one thing I know for sure is, whether they make my laugh, or cry, or stop me from sleeping, I truly do cherish my memories, I truly cherish all the people and places and events connected to those memories, no matter how they make me feel, and I will never ever forget them. They will always matter, they will always have a place in my heart.

Now playing: Hinithun velaashey kalaa

no pic this time hehe.....

"When we are all grown up, when we have kids of our own, a family, a job, this moment right now....will we remember it?" - Chrono Cross

Who Are You?

2008-09-14T07:03:00.000-07:00

Original Speech

Money Well Spent

2008-09-13T22:10:00.000-07:00

In regards to food, there are two kinds of people in the world, those who eat to live, and those that who live to eat. I am of the later type. I pride myself in been a bit of a gourmet. I have been to almost all (save for maybe one or two) restaurants in male' and the connected islands (meaning hulhumale', villingili, hulhule,....yes even the new restaurant they recently opened in hulhule' island hotel). But there was someplace I always wanted to go, the Ocean Breeze restaurant in the hulhumale' ferry terminal. I never got around to going there because I don’t like eating alone, and honestly there wasn’t anyone I wanted to give such an expensive diner to. My friends have got beef steaks because I don’t like eating alone hehe....but this, was just too much.

Then last Friday, I heard that breaking fast at Ocean Breeze was 150 per person. Now this was a reasonable price. But still being reasonable broke these days after buying a Playstation 3, I still couldn’t pay for my two friends that I would have to take, it wouldn’t have been fair to just give one of them a treat. Of course giving one pretty darn good girl a treat, I could have and would have done (I know...its unfair, girls get too many free stuff :P). But alas, I had no girls to take either. But since I really wanted to go, I thought maybe I could talk my two good buddies’ into paying at least 100 for themselves. Luckily I managed to do this (Yes, I may seem like a manipulative bastard, but hey they got a good meal out of it XD), one of them paid there half in full, and the other a 100. After about 5 or so calls to the damn place (It was like fully booked almost every day for the entire week), we finally got a place for the very next day due to a cancelation.

The place was pretty damn good. The food was plentiful and awesome, I especially liked the beef. And even the place was super duper nice. Like we stepped into some other place. Every time the door opened for someone to come in and we saw the outside. It was like, what’s that garbage dump out there? This restaurant was definitely the nicest in male'. I ate like a LOT, I could barely move after I had finished. And desert was awesome too; French Vanilla ice-cream and some sort of biscuit fudge dish. I don’t even like biscuit fudge, but this...this was pretty darn good. So all in all it was 150 well spend. I still would like to go there for an open budget diner, as soon as I find someone...a.k.a a girl worth bringing....or as soon as the damn girl agrees XD.

And no jokes about am I paid to advertise Ocean Breeze. I am not, but it is a place worth checking out, do it before Ramadan passes or most of you wont be able to afford it.

Fading Beauty

2008-08-12T03:42:00.000-07:00

This is my rose, no some girl didn't give it to me, I got it off a bouquet of roses at work o.o....it was the most beautiful one in it. This photo does little justice to its beauty, all who have so far seen it agrees that its the most beautiful rose they have ever seen.
The rose is currently lying in a sorta paper wrapping in my refrigerator, cox I herd that is how it will last longest. I'll be so sad when it withers, but so far its doing pretty good. If I meet someone I want to give a rose to before this rose withers, I intend to give it to that girl.
It was just so beautiful that I had to share it with everyone....but still the picture doesn't say enough.

"At the face of your beauty, the rest of the world, loses its color" - Crimson Solace

People I Hate

2008-08-06T03:25:00.000-07:00

Listed below are the 10 kinds of people that I hate the most, in order from least to most. All of these features are there to some extent in all of us, even me. It is when they become the defining characteristic of a person, it becomes a problem. Well here goes.

10. Indolent: Being lazy isn’t a crime, but it isn’t exactly the best thing to be either. I don’t like people who won’t do something just because they are just too lazy to get there butt off where there sitting, or hoping that someone else will come and do it for them. And the worst part is, most of these people are complaining how life is bad, that nothing good ever happens, how nobody is doing anything for them. This country has become quite abundant with these types these days. You know what? Nothing goods ever going to happen if you don’t do something about it, being lazy and not working for it or trying to make others do everything for you wont work. Life is hard and cruel, if you want something, you are going to have to go out there and get it.

9. Craven: Cowards are among the worst people in the world. I am not talking about being afraid of the dark or scary movies or stuff like that. In fact it is fine to be scared. People think being brave is been fearless, but it isn’t. Bravery is been able to act despite fear, being able to take action even when your shaking in you shoes, even when your worried sick what the consequences of there actions will be. People who even refrain from doing the right thing, or help out a friend because they are too afraid of what might happen to them are not worth even a cent in my book.

8. Avarice: Wealth and possessions are all good, I want them too, and we should try hard to achieve them. But it is when this need for wealth over takes us, it becomes a problem. These days we see people so overcome with greed they would go to any extent to get money and possessions. Even sell there own parents to make a quick fortune. We should never allow greed to consume us to such a extent that we would throw aside everything else for wealth.

7. Hypocrite: These days everyone seems to have an opinion on everything, always telling others what they should and should not do. But many lack the decency to stick to what they say. One moment they are saying one thing, and the next they are doing the exact opposite. Don’t give others advice, or voice your opinion if it isn’t something you would do yourself. We must first look to ourselves before we judge or advice others.

6. Miser: I guess most people think there isn’t much of a difference between been greedy and been a miser, but I beg to differ. A miser is someone who has a lot of money, but would rather keep it all in his bank account than spend even a penny. Some say it’s knowing the value of money, or economizing. But that’s just crap; these are people who really don’t know the value of money. Money isn’t the final objective, it only a means to getting what you want. That present for your loved one, that new game you want, the cool car you saw, the delicious food you like, the relaxing holiday….these are the things money is for. You can always make more money, but the happiness it can bring, is invaluable. No matter how damn hard you try, you can’t take it with you.

5. Corrupt: In my opinion people who are bestowed with power and status, are done so for the greater good. They are given the responsibility of using it to do the right thing. How ever more than many, stray from the righteous path and work to better there own lives. They start using the power and influence that was intended to be used for the betterment of the masses, for there own gain. I sometimes wonder how such people can sleep at night, knowing that there happiness came at the cost of the betterment of so many peoples lives.

4. Petulant: Some people think they are so cool getting angry over every little thing. They think that if they shout enough and get angry everyone will do things there way. I for one would not bend to a angry person, he can throw as many damn tantrums as he want, he just will have to calm down and ask me nicely before I do it for him. Anger is never good, it clouds your judgment, and you do things you regret later. Plus, no one really likes someone who always gets angry. It’s always better to keep a cool head, and do things logically than out of pure anger. And really, its ok to feel anger, just not ok to always act on it, keeping it aside and keeping a cool head works best.

3. Two-Faced: We all have a lot of friends, but have you ever wondered how true a friend they are? Some people tend to act al nice and friendly in front of you, as if you’re the best person in the whole wide world, but the moment your back is turned you’re the worst person to ever see the light of day. I HATE people like that; if you have a problem with me, at least have the decency to say it to my face, don’t go pretending to be my friend just in front of me.

2. Liars: I guess the fact that liars made it to second spot must portray how much I despise them. If a friend lies to me for a reason that is not very good, I feel like connecting my hand with my friends face. Most of the time I can tell when people are lying, it really pisses me off. Being honest really is the best policy, there only VERY few circumstances under which you should really lie. Like if you life or a friends life depended on it. I certainly admire someone who is honest, even if they are saying something that doesn’t really make me happy. Lies would be much worse that hurting my feelings or making me a bit sad.

1. Traitors: a.k.a those that are unforgivable. It would be very difficult to find it in my heart to forgive someone who betrayed me; especially if it was someone who I really trusted. I expect my friends to stick with me through even the hardest times, because I would do the same for them. I would rather be poor, shamed, in prison, dead…or even all of them, then turning my back on a friend, or selling them out to save my own hide. Friends are invaluable, I would never give any of them up for even all the money in the world. A traitor is someone who doesn’t know the true value of a friend. I have herd stories of traitors, and I wonder how they can find it in them to destroy someone who held them dear, who helped them, who were good them. I certainly could never do that.

A Time For Heroes

2008-07-30T02:02:00.000-07:00

History is filled with many heroes; conquerors and defenders, those that stood up when there country was threatened by others demanding bloodshed. The same can be said for this country; when ever we were threatened by outside forces, we saw brave souls who gave there lives to protect this country. Without them we would be seeing a very dark, different day today. But heroes, are not only needed when a country is threatened by outside forces, but also when someone is needed to do what’s right. And today, this country needs a hero.
Today we are facing one of the darkest times in our little countries history. Corruption has become the way of life for our society. Violence has become the solution for our problems. Drugs are destroying the lives of our youth and there families. Everyone knows this, everyone says it, but that’s just as far as it goes. Everyone is too busy advancing there own lives to do anything about it. After all why not? Everything comes down to money; corruption is money, violence is money, drugs are money, and it seems money makes everything better for most people.
We have been filled by people advancing there own lives under the guise of doing the right thing. People preaching promises of better times and freedom to an audience that doesn’t even know what freedom really is. Flying the flag of freedom only as a means to power. We have become a country of idiots who cannot think for ourselves and cowards who would rather do the easy thing rather than the right thing. We have thrown away the peace we enjoyed for so long in return for false promises and a divided nation.
Is this the nation or forefathers sacrificed there lives for? Did they defend it from outside forces with there every breath only to have it destroyed by us? I highly doubt it; they would turn in there graves to know that all they did might just be in vain. Today there is almost no one, especially within out youth, who would truly fight, or give there lives up for this country. Maybe it’s because it may no longer be a country worth fighting for. A country filled with people who cannot even tell right from wrong. A country filled with people who cannot even think for themselves.
Every nation is filled with people of different ideas, thoughts and walks of life. But that’s what a country is, that’s what makes up a country. That’s what makes a country great. It’s those different ideas and thoughts that make up a nation. It is not a basis for division and discrimination. We have shown on various occasions that we all can get along, if we really want to.
This country is heading for even darker times if we let it. All we need is someone, who is truly working for the good of the nation, to step up and do what is right; someone to lead by example and be a true leader and icon. A hero who will sacrifice himself for the good of a nation rather than his own gain. But, does such a person even exist?

"Heroes are people who take on the problems of others, simply because no one else will" - Crimson Solace

Still Standing

2008-07-29T01:15:00.000-07:00

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SPOILER WARNING: The first paragraph of this post contains, major spoilers of the movie, The Mist by Stephan King. If you do not want to read it, skip the first paragraph.
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How many of you have watched the Stephan King's The Mist that was released in 2007? It’s an exceptionally good movie with a bit of a twist at the end. It’s a story about a group of people trapped in a supermarket due to a sudden mist that appears. It is not the mist itself that is dangerous, but the un-earthly creatures of the mist. The story mainly focuses on a man named David Drayton and his five year old son Billy Drayton. Towards the end of the movie, David, his son and three other people manage to escape from the supermarket in a car. They drive till the fuel tank becomes empty, but is unable to find an end to the mist. So rather than to face a gruesome and painful death of there bodies been torn apart by monsters, they decide to use a gun to kill themselves. However with only four bullets left, David decides to kill everyone else and sacrifice himself. But moments after he shoots his own son and the other survivors, people who appear to be the army appears, vanquishing the monsters, thinning the mist and helping any survivors. This movie, in my opinion, is an exaggeration of how life can be. You never know what’s around the corner, which is why, you should never give up.

Life from birth until death is a war. You face one battle after another, and face times of peace and serenity. From the kid who is worried about failing his next math test, to the business man facing bankruptcy and an unfaithful wife, we are all facing our problems. In almost everyone’s lives, we come to a point at which we feel that things can’t get any worse, that there is absolutely no way out of the hole you just fell into. But the fact of the matter is, life can always, it can always get worse. But just as it can get worse, it can always get better too.

Different people act differently during trying times, some people fight, some people run away, some people release there anger and frustration on the ones they love, and some people simply decide to check out. But nothing, no matter how bad, or how hard life gets, is worth ending your life over. Even when things get darkest, you never know what tomorrow will bring. Doe instance if your bankrupt, live poor for a while and try to get back on your feet. You can always live on. It is those who endure life’s pains and sorrows, which truly see a better a day. No matter how worse things get, believe that it can always get better, just as easily as it got worse. And that somewhere out there, there is someone in a much worse of condition than you.

Sometimes when life rears is ugly head at us; we tend to take it out on the people who care about us; our family, friends, spouses or girlfriends and boyfriends. They certainly do not deserve that. But in the frustration, anger and sorrow we feel, we tend to turn against them even when all they are doing is trying to help. However the fact is, at times like these, friends are really who you need most. With good friends, you can overcome, and survive trough anything. Discarding them or distancing ourselves from them will only make our lives worse, for both us and our friends.

Life seldom turns out the way we want it, things go wrong, and we end up in situations that we do not wish for. But that shouldn’t mean we should throw in the towel and check ourselves out of this life. History has shown great people, and even today there are people who we admire. But those that are truly great, are those who get hit over and over again, and still keep going.

“The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place, and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit, it is about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much can you take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you.” - Rocky Balboa; Rocky Balboa (2006)

Epilogue: My Friends

2008-07-28T08:11:00.000-07:00

To me, meeting all of them had been a life changing experience. It was shortly after I had decided to pick up the pieces of my shattered life that I met them. And I will have to say, without them keeping going forward without looking back, would have be so much harder. They showed me that there was a life beyond what I once loved and valued. That there is still so much out there left to see.
Sasuke had been my friend long before I met the rest of them, one of my closest friends. He knew me during the times when I thought death might be a bit better than this (no, I never tried to kill myself :P). He is great friend who I know I can count on, and was there through the hard times to cheer me on. He has also been trying hard to find me someone else, but pity he mostly knows girls his age :P. He’s cool and fun to hang out with, although he still has much to learn. But hey 14 is still young, he’s got time.
B1 has become a great friend over the past few weeks. It was my pleasure helping her through her problems, and it seems something’s I said influenced some of her biggest decisions (though I am not really sure I say things THAT good, maybe she just hasn’t heard a lot). Out of everyone she’s who I know most about, she’s like an honorary little sister....hehe (not belittling anyone else). Fun and interesting to hang out with and nice to have conversations with. Well I hope she now has a hot enough guy to sit at my wedding with ;) (If I ever have one that is).
B2...aah B2, hmmmm....sadly haven’t been able to talk to her much, as she rarely gets online anymore. It seems she’s trying to get an honour-listed to get a mobile phone. Good luck with that by the way. B2 has many of the qualities I like, hyperactive, talkative outgoing, smart, funny.....and easy to spook and annoy (now that parts just for my entertainment). Ya I know I tease her a lot, but that’s just fun, I think she’s awesome, I just wonder how she will be given some more years, thinking how she is now. Now, that will be something interesting to see.
DM sure turned my opinion about her around in the weeks that followed. For one thing I don’t think the name DM is really appropriate...how about....BUTT GIRL....hehehe....just kidding. Uuuh I really can’t think of a new name right now, let’s just go with what she likes to say is the long form of DM, we can go with that, though she really isn’t in anyway dangerous. She’s really talkative one you get to know her better, both online and in person, I love her frog-run too :P. She’s someone awesome to talk to when you’re bored at work or just lonely, she can really make the day interesting with some of the stuff she says. A bit childish at times, but I guess that too is part of her charm.
Punk-Teddy, well I only got to know her well over the past two weeks or so. But so far I do like what I know. And I think the name I picked out of her is quite appropriate. She’s nice, kind, treats her friends well....all qualities I like. A curious type girl who likes finding stuff out and trying new things. I have had a good time chatting with her over the past week or two. It’s a pity that you have to leave, I know that others as well as me will miss you a lot.
I don’t care what anyone says, kids aint bad....there pretty darn good, sure they have their flaws, but older people have too many flaws. You know how hard it is to nicely talk to most girls my age? Next to damn impossible, they all either think everyone’s up to something or they are too good to talk to most guys. Most of them don’t even give anyone a chance to get to know each other better. Plus my any girlfriend I get must be age 16 or above rule, makes kids awesome friends, there is no “ooh is this going somewhere thoughts from either of us”. So it makes it so much easier to be friends with them. Sure they may not be able to get out a lot, but when they do, they know how to have fun, I do go out with older people every now and then, and I have to tell you, most of them are really boring, and the ones that aren’t....there idea of fun, is breaking every rule in the book, hey I don’t have problem with breaking most of the rules....but there’s a limit to that, clean and simple fun is much better.
You know now that I read this, it sounds, and awful lot like a goodbye post at some points. But that’s the last thing this is. Until all of them grow up and become like the snobbish girls I mentioned above and think they are too good enough to hang with some old guy like me, I shall be there friend :P....but I do hope that doesn’t happen. And even when I go abroad for studies, they will be on the things I will surely miss from home. Climbing the sand hill, shoving people in the car baggage compartment, seeing the snipers, dropping pizza on police officers (btw I hear someone is investigating who dropped a slice of pizza on his head :P)...and so much more, are all memories I will cherish for a long time. If in this post or in any previous ones I have said anything really offensive, I do apologize for that, and I will gladly take it off. And as for this post, what I wrote about each of them is in no way decreasing the value of the other. I met them all under different circumstances of their lives, and each person is a different and unique personality, that is why it may seem I am saying more about some people than others.
I do know quite a number of people, even people whose names I cannot quite remember. But my friends are few, very few. I don’t even call everyone I know my friends, there are acquaintances’ and then there are friends. You could easily count the number of friends I have. And I consider all of these kids, my friends. I don’t give a rats ass what anyone says about that.:D.

“A good friend will bail you out of jail and lecture you about how you messed up. A great friend will be sitting right next to you laughing about it saying "damn, we really screwed up!" – Unknown (Damn who ever said this is one awesome dude)

Day 3: Making a Statement

2008-07-27T22:37:00.000-07:00

It was a Friday and I was at Sasuke-Guy’s house, playing Assassin’s Creed by combining my awesome laptop with his huge TV. Assassin’s Creed is an awesome game; I love it, the graphics, and the realism, Altaïr….uh this post isn’t about Assassin’s Creed, so lets me move on to what it is really about.
The plans for that day was to later on hang out during the others, around 8 or so. This had been a plan made one week in advance, and I was invited to come. At first it was everyone meeting. But than at one point B1 & B2 had to go to resorts (Two different resorts), although that was at that time who I was most friendly with (DM isn’t the talkative type and I really didn’t know much about Punk-Teddy) I decided to go. DM was especially keen on taking me, saying that she will talk this time, that she will annoy me, and that she won’t disappear with a bf this time. (Ya she sounds like a politician making promises for her next election :P)
Anyway soon the time came, and we met up with them near Fantasy Bakery. Punk-Teddy, DM, DM’s sis and Arky were already in the car. Before I got in I asked Sasuke-Guy “Which one is DM?” They both look really alike to me, and it wouldn’t have been nice if I said something to the wrong girl.
As this time there weren’t so many people as before (and I think it was bigger car than before), we really didn’t have to squeeze in, I certainly was comfortably seated.
We drove to the same place as previous two nights, the carnival main gate. Punk-Teddy’s bro was already waiting for us there, and we were also soon joined by Punk-Teddy’s bf. We loitered around a bit considering where to go. DM still didn’t say much, so I said a few words, but all she did was, stand there smiling like an idiot.
Soon we decided to go to dolphin and started walking in that direction. Following standard procedure, DM and her sister were the first to leave our group. They didn’t even make it to the steps going up to Dolphin. Halfway through they met some guys (which I assumed were there bf’s) and parted ways with us.
We went up to Dolphin, joined two tables, and took our seats, leaving to empty chairs for DM and her sister. We talked a bit, mostly just small talk, I also told Punk-Teddy about what had happened the previous day. Then Punk-Teddy’s brother got a call and left saying he had to go meet up with some people, and that he would be back. Some time passed and Punk-Teddy said that she and her bf would go and find the rest of them. “Raaaaight, that’s exactly why you two a going, to find the rest of us” That’s what I was thinking at that moment. “Ya, sure” that’s what I said. But before they left we made her give us her wallet, so that we could eat, even if no one showed up. After they left we ordered our food and a vanilla milkshake for Punk-Teddy.
So there we were Me, Sasuke-Guy and Arky sitting at a table with mostly empty seats, to a gathering which I thought would involve more people. Soon the topic turned into how messed up this was. We had just been ditched, to a get together we had been INVITED to. I mean the three of us could hang out, anywhere, anytime we wanted. We didn’t have to allocate specific time, or make specific plans for that. I really understand, and have nothing against that they want to spend time with there significant others. BUT, if that was what they wanted to do, there was no need to invite us, as none of us are on the list of there significant others. (Ok, in case certain two people decide to flame me because of that sentence, I am talking about that time, and the people that were there then)
I decided to go take a look around, to see if I could find anyone. The first one I noticed was DM’s sis, she and her bf were near the stage area railings. Walking around a bit, I saw DM, she had a boy on her….lol….uuh she was walking around with her bf, who had his arms on her shoulder. I thought she saw me, but I later found out she didn’t. The others were no where in sight.
I went back to Dolphin and came up with the plan. We were not going to take this sitting down (well until we finish eating that is). We were not going to call them, we were not going to beg them to come, it was simple common sense that if you invite someone, you should stay with them for most of the time. We decided to make a statement. We were just going to finish eating, pay with Punk-Teddy’s money, and leave. As we were eating DM called us. I was the one to talk to her; she asked us where we were. I told her that we had left, I intended to tell her that we were at dolphin later, but the conversation got quite long and I forgot (Sorry about that, its totally against my no lie policy).
So we finished our food, paid for it, then very nicely walked to where DM and her sister were, gave her Punk-Teddy’s wallet and simply left.
I would have to say the only good part about that night was the free food, and even that wasn’t that great. DM was quite like most politicians. They too make a lot of promises, but when they achieve there goal, they are unable to keep those promises. I always looked at my self as an honest person, who tells it like it is; maybe there are some people who don’t like me for that, but that’s just me. And as for that night, I have to say, I didn’t quite like what they did. Ya sure, walking out on my treat, may seem worse to most people, but that night, I know that it was in no way there fault, and they could do nothing to change it. But inviting someone out, and then ditching them, that’s something you can change.
I totally understand, and even support the fact that they will want to hang out with there bf’s alone. But if that’s all you want to do, there’s no need to drag others along. Well another lesson learned I guess. Do not go if B1 & B2 are not going, even though they both have bf’s….I can drag one of them out of where ever they are hiding (plus I know he wouldn’t ditch me anyway….raaaight?) and B2…well so far she hasn’t totally ditched others altogether to be with her bf.
Ya I know bf’s are very important, but so are friends, no one should ever forget that.

Day 2: Just Kids With Bedtimes....

2008-07-20T03:21:00.000-07:00

Since the day at the carnival grounds, I had pretty much become good friends with everybody. Everyone except Punk-Teddy had added me on msn (really I mean no offense by saying that, just stating facts :P). They were all interesting to talk to and I considered them among my friends list.

I was at Sasuke-Guys house watching the movie untraceable when he got the call. It was B1 & B2 calling. They were at the Carnival and were bored. DM and her sister was spending time with there significant others and they were alone. So they asked him to come. But Sasuke-Guy being the g…. uh person he is he was reluctant to do so. It took a little convincing from me to make him go. So we (we meaning me, Sasuke-Guy and Arky) left for the Carnival. We told Sasuke-Guys mother that we were going somewhere nearby…then walked a little, called her mum and says the place was full so we are taking a cab and going to the carnival.

At the carnival grounds we found them in the dark area behind Skippy (yes I too do wonder what a bunch of little girls…and there bf’s are doing there:P). We first met B1 & B2, it seems B2 had called Sasuke-Guy instead of her bf (Guess girls do like hanging around a ga....). I stood there trying to scare (and succeeding too) B2. Soon we were joined by DM when her bf left for basketball tryouts. She just like the previous day, stood silently.

So we just stayed there, joking and stuff. Then someone noticed something yellow in the trees nearby (I think it was B2 herself). But this time she got scared by herself, yes I admit I did push just a little bit, but later I even said it was nothing, its just a bunch of leaves, I even went and touched it. But she was still scared. What I really wanted to do was put my hand into the trees…and act and scream like something got me. But I decided against doing that. I didn’t want to be responsible for giving a 13 year old a heart attack.

Then B2 started showing everyone something that was written on the far wall. She asked everyone what she saw. (Btw when I later knew what she really was doing…I have to say…it surprised me…she’s smarter than I thought :P). I honestly didn’t see anything, no one but B2 was able to see what was written on the wall. We all tried really hard…looking in different angles…guessing…but with no avail. B1 walked a little further from us to look at the wall. I too followed and stood next to her looking at the wall. I’m sure you people all have seen Tom & Jerry, you remember when sometimes Tom jumps….straight out of his skin?....That’s kinda what happened next. B1 suddenly noticed me standing next to her, got startled and jumped….I mean she really ACTUALLY jumped….I was surprised when she did that too….but I was able to keep my two feet firmly on the ground :P
Soon they started saying that they were hungry, and I got a thought I would regret in a short while. “I think I will give them a treat tonight, they are my friends, and once the holidays end, I wont get to meet them a lot, so I think I will give them a treat tonight” Thinking this, I told them I can feed them, and everyone agreed. So all of us (me, Sasuke-guy, B1, B2, DM & Arky) headed to skippy and took our seats. “Oder what ever you want” I told them. Most asked for fish and chips. So we ordered and we were sitting there talking and joking…and then ev….uh DM’s sister came and said they have to go. At first I was a little confused to what was going on, but then when I realized that they were leaving my first thoughts were “What the F*** !!” It seems when her mother called DM’s sis, she told her mother that they had finished eating and that they had to go…so now…they had to go. All us guys were saying don’t go. We tried cancelling the order, but it was too late now. I tried a few times to make them stay…but then I just went speechless.

Have any of you ever been, sad, angry and annoyed all the same time? I assure you….it aint nice. I hadn’t felt this bad since my great depression. I was giving free food and these people were LEAVING. “Here you can have the money I brought” DM’s sister replied. Now if it was someone else I would have either stormed out of there or shouted. To me that was like adding insult to injury, to think that I was upset about something as material as money. But I knew she meant well, so I just said its ok, she can keep the money.

My whole night had been ruined, they left all saying how sorry they were, but that didn’t change the fact that this sucked. I knew this wasn’t there fault, but that didn’t make things better either. Soon the food came and I was staring at empty chairs. Not to waste the food, Sasuke-Guy and Arky called up two people they knew and invited them over. GREAT, just great…now I was feeding a bunch of people I don’t even know. Call me whatever you want, but the fact of the matter is; I don’t mind spending on my friends, but feeding people I have never met, is just a waste of my money.

That I guess is pretty much the end of day two, we finished up the food and went home. They really were sorry, I knew they were. They said they would make it up to me…but honestly that doesn’t matter, what’s done is done….I’m not gonna keep pulling at one thing a hundred times. But one thing I learned is, no matter how fun they are, no matter how grown up they want to act and be….at the end of the day, they are just a bunch of kids with bedtime. I would do well not to forget that.

STILL NOT THE END

Day 1: Kids Are Fun

2008-07-14T11:18:00.001-07:00

Ever since Sasuke-guys birthday party at his house, I was told that some girls were throwing a party for him (can you believe this guy?), at first it was more than 10 girls, but the number depleted, or some other girls held party for him, either way the final number came down to just the girls who had attended Sasuke-guys first party.

Although I had been told of this party, I really had no interest in going, (not to mention that I wasn't invited). But on the day that the party was finally held, I went. Mostly because I was really bored and I am a doing stuff on impulse kinda guy and that day’s impulse was to go. So I uuuh invited myself to the party.

Sasuke-guy and me, left from his house and headed towards Punk-Teddy's house where the party was at. As we entered the alley in which her house was, I heard some giggling and looked up, to see....well a bunch of giggling girls at one of the windows in the building (the third floor if I remember correctly). And in their hands, were water balloons. Have you seen the Friends episode where Ross has a really young girl friend, and the gf and her friends throw water balloons, well this was kinda like that, except these girls were an awful shot...I mean AWFUL. My auto reflex was to jump back, but Sasuke-guy didn’t, and even then it didn’t hit him, there were a few more balloons that dropped down on us, but none of them even managed to wet us even a little bit. I guess little girls arnt really good shots. But this was certainly a fun start.

After "evading" the barrage of water balloons that was thrown at us, we climbed the stairs to Punk-Teddy's apartment. Unfortunately there were no more surprises waiting for us (yes unfortunately, more surprises would have been fun). B1, B2 and Punk-Teddy were smiling as if they had done something great by missing all the water balloons they had thrown at us.

The next hour or so, was relatively uneventful. DM and her sister arrived soon afterwards. We ate short eats, cut a countline chocolate cake they had got for Sasuke-guy and ate that too. As I waited I did a little analysis, a psycho profile if you might, of the people there. The sweet, but a bit shy girl, the hyper active talkative one, the shy, distant girl (either that she's mute :P) and the friendly but....bit crazy girl (and that would be the one who tried to set fire to the cherries). I was correct to some extent with my analysis on all of them.

Soon we decided to go to skippy's, by the time we were able to leave with all the dilly dally of girls, it was dark, and as I made my way down the stairs, I made a most amusing discovery. B2 was real easy to scare, I mean extremely easy to scare. All I had to do was make a few noises and she went, "please stop". (yes, picking on small children right, I don’t care what you think, fun is fun, and for you information, I am not age biased, show me an older girl or guy who’s a scardy cat, and I will pick on her too :P, and if it’s a GUY, I will laugh him straight out of town).

Downstairs we waited for quite some time for a ride, I noticed that DM and her sis were at a corner a bit away from us, but I really did not know what to do about that, so I just picked on/talked to B2, B1 and Punk-Teddy. Soon...well not soon, our ride came. It was not a really big ride, so we ended up being all squished inside it. Now....if it was with a bunch of older girls...I wouldn’t be complaining, but this was like being squished with sisters or cousins....just plain un-comfortable, maybe Sasuke-guy enjoyed it....or on the other hand, maybe not, I was after all the only other guy in there.

Soon after we made it to skippy, Punk-Teddy's bf showed up, her brother was also with us there. At Skippy's we went for the rides, first was the bumper cars, they were ok, but I think I am gonna stick to Mercedes in Need for Speed :P. Next we went on the frog jump; which was this ride which went up and down and up and down. Since only three people could get on it at a time, in my turn B1, B2 and I went. I chose that group because I had a feeling that would be most fun. While B1 for the most part sat quietly next to me, B2 was on fire, screaming and shouting, it was hilarious....I honestly have seen better action.....uuuh never mind.

I soon noticed that somewhere between entering skippy and going on the rides, DM and her sister had disappeared. I was not really sure, but I did see them with some boys. Anyway after that we went for some drinks....and people started "disappearing" till finally it was just me, Sasuke-guy, B1 & B2. Then Sasuke-guy mentioned something about love, and everyone came to instant alert, are you in love...who do you love?...I think the idea of Sasuke-guy being in love struck a chord somewhere deep within everyone...lol.

Soon we got up from our seats and headed out, all the way B1 was asking about this girl Sasuke-guy loved, and she wouldn’t stop until he gave her an answer. We stayed in the Carnival courtyard near the gate, joking around, either waiting for DM and her sister, or our ride, or maybe both, am not really sure right now. We were all joking around and pushing each other. As B2's back was turned, I pushed her into a puddle, well she didn’t fall INTO it, but she stepped into it. And she was all "Oh god, mud on my pants...my mum will kill", and then she turned around and asked who it was. I owned up, but she would not believe me :. (I don’t think even now she believes it). She said someone "stronger" pushed her, and I don’t look strong. After repeatedly saying I did it, she decided to go after me, even though she didn’t believe me.

Well, she was really weak, couldn’t even move me, or I simply stepped out of the way, then Punk-Teddy and her bro got involved...well let’s just say I never stood a chance against them. I did my best to avoid them, but in the end, they pushed me into the puddle. And B2 was acting like it was a big victory even though she failed (weak little girl :P)

Then I went towards the dark alley behind the trees in the carnival ground, they said not to because people do "stuff" there (but B2 was mostly concerned about things that go bump in the night). I went ahead and saw that there was no one there and that it was really short....but dark. So as I knew everyone else would soon follow me, I hid in an enclosure in the wall. Then I specifically waited till B2, came up and shouted. NOW THAT WAS FUN. It seems it was really dark and NO BODY had noticed me. I scared the shit out of everyone. B2 was screaming, even the others shouted a little or went back a little till they realised it was me.

Soon our ride came, and there was more uncomfortable squishing and we arrived at Punk-Teddy's house. And that was the end of that day.

I know it may not seem really fun when you read it, or a bit childish, (I don’t really care) but I have been out with grown up gangs too, it wasn’t that fun. So as of today, I stand corrected, kids are fun.

NOT THE END

Intro: Meet the Gang

2008-07-11T08:10:00.001-07:00

This new post so far is planned to be the first of a 5 post story, about something that happened to someone, this first post will be like a character description plus some sort of prologue. Am gonna write the story in first person view, as I am not really good at writing in third person.
Anyway, here are the cast of the story;
Name: Damian
Age: 19
The main patron of this story, just an average guy. Not much to be said about him. And no, the picture inst an exaggeration, he does look too young to be 19.

Name: Sasuke-Guy
Age: 13 - 14
A Sasuke wannabe, used to ask people to even call him Sasuke before everyone started teasing him. He says hes "over" Sasuke, but everyone has there doubts, many thinks hes just in denial. Likes animes, video games, movies etc....and knows a LOT of girls. But hes like Sasuke in that he would rather do something else, then do something with all the girls that are interested in him. An overall ok cool guy, but sometimes a little....well how shall I say....do u know the song that goes something like "oooh Aaaaaim too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts"....I dont really need to tell much more right?

Name: B1
Age: 12
The younger of the two bananas, why she got designated 1, was probably due to winning of some argument over who will be one. The silent loner type, except with her best friend B2. Known to get surprised easily, so approach with caution.

Name: B2
Age: 13
Almost the complete opposite of B2, hyperactive, talkative, known to be smart on some occasions (Well I guess if you shoot enough bullets at least one of them will hit the target). Known to get spooked VERY easily (I mean common its just a bunch of leaves). Very girly, worried about sand and mud and all that. B1 and B2 have been together since almost birth. Fun to spook and annoy.

Name: DM
Age: 13
First impression would be a thin, lost in her own world kinda girl, and you would be right on the most part. REALLY talkative online, but face to face....well lets just say, even a dead fish would say more. Of everyone....she has the most...well lets say "different" thoughts. Shes the kind that really talks the talk....but has a hard time walking the walk.

Name: Punk-Teddy
Age: 13
Not much to be said as much to still be known, included her here as she is in this story, and is one the gang.

Prologue
It was Sasuke-Guys birthday party night that I first met them, they were the only non family invitees save for one or two.
Sasuke-Guy introduced me to them, and told them I was 19, which they refused to believe until I threatened to show my ID card.
"Damn, this is boring, just a bunch of gossiping little girls" I thought as I sat there.
I tried very hard to start some sort of fun activity to make the party a bit more interesting, but I had a tough time getting there attention. B1 & B2 were going all blah, blah, blah, blah. DM was lost in her own world, and Punk-Bear was playing a Gameboy Advanced. I mean common this is a PARTY, you can do that stuff even at home, how lamer can kids get huh.
Finally after a lot of hard work, I was able to get there attention, but just as things got interesting, most of them had to leave.
"Just as I thought, a bunch of boring little kids with bed times"

To be continued.....

Happily Ever After....

2008-07-08T22:55:00.000-07:00

…And then the prince rode the princess to his castle on his white horse, and they lived happily ever after.

What a load of crap!

Growing up, I am sure all of us have been greatly touched by these fairy tales, these tales of happily ever afters. We fill out minds with thoughts of princes and princes and heroic deeds that win over the fair maiden. As we grow up, our thoughts do become more realistic, but deep down we are still searching for that prince to take us to his castle that he built just for us, or to find out which “heroic” tasks will win over the maiden that will win over the maiden that we desire. So this we may live happily ever after with our “the one”.

Love is the ultimate source of happiness that everyone seeks, and since this post is about love (although it may at first have seemed to be about fairy tales:P), let me be very cliché and write the dictionary meaning of love. The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines love as strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (yes there are a few more, I am just listing the first one). This is just one of the definitions of love, if you search the internet you can find thousands more. I guess in the end, what love is, is just a matter of opinion.

Love is sacrifice, love is wanting to make someone happy, love is wanting to protect them, to make sure they never shed a tear. Love is doing everything in you power, just to see them smile. Love is being able to sacrifice what you want for someone else, and in the end be happy because that person is happy. Love is being there for someone, because it makes yourself happy. To love is not to regret the sacrifices you make, and to be by their side no matter what.

That’s what I can think of about love, I know there will be, many people who disagree with my definition of love, and many who will say such love doesn’t exist. I am not here to say, I am right, or to prove that such love exists, but only to say that, that is what I think true love is.

Deep down inside, most of us do have a fairy tale impression of love; that if we truly love someone nothing else matters, that everything else will be all right. And that we live happily ever after once we find true love. But the reality is far from this. Love isn’t about happy endings, fate, destiny, the one and all that shit. Finding love isn’t a happy ending, it’s only the beginning, of a constant battle to keep our happiness secure.

There isn’t any such person as the one, there are many people in the world that we can make it with, who we end up with depends on the actions and choices we make. Just because we really love someone doesn’t make everything work out, love doesn’t rise against all the winds of the world and triumph over everything.

I know I sound like a total cynic, but I am really a big believer of love. Of true love, that love is a great power that can fuel you and help you accomplish extraordinary things. Love is happiness, it is the ultimate joy. But it is not enough. You can truly love someone more than anything else in the whole world and still do a lot of crappy stuff. And that is when, love isn’t enough.

“What? Do I still love you? Absolutely. There's not a doubt in my mind. Through all my anger, my ego, I was always faithful in my love for you. That I ever made you doubt is the great mistake in a life full of mistakes. I can tell you that I love you as many times as you can stand to hear it but it doesn't set us free, all it does is remind us that love is not enough. It's not even close” – Life is a house - 2001

My Inspiration...

2008-06-28T23:23:00.000-07:00

If I was asked what influenced my life the most apart from my parents, I would definitely have to say television and video games. Yes I know, people say that movies and video games especially these days are a bad influence. Watching TV and playing video games rots your brains and leads to violence and bad behavior and shit.

Some weeks ago I caught something of interest as my dad was watching the recording of the parliamentary meeting. “In other country’s it has been seen that the youth become violent due to violent video games and such, we need to do necessary investigations and take the steps needed to prevent this”. My first thought was “Hey idiot, keep your damn politics out of my video games”. I would also be one of the first people on the streets if they ever took steps against video games. Anyway point is, video games as well as television has developed a bad reputation, or at least has become a scapegoat for the reason behind youth violence and behavior.

It is true that especially over the past years, both the television (and by television I mean everything from series, movies, anime, cartoons, reality shows etc.) and video games have become both graphically violent and immoral. Many a time have drug lords, smugglers, assassins and many other criminals been made the hero or heroine of games and movies. And the amount of violence has escalated from just gunshots to decapitations and torture. But come on, it doesn’t take an IQ of a 160 to figure out that all that is wrong. That’s its just television and games, and that is where all that should stay. You don’t play GTA and go out and steal a car or start a fight, or kill someone. Or play Need for Speed and go start racing on the streets. Or watch godfather and start selling drugs or extorting people. I disagree that movies and games affect us in a negative way. Only a person who already has serious moral issues would go and copy all the crap they see. Its parents and society who really shape who we are, I have played and watched a lot of this stuff, and so have my friends….you don’t see us out stealing cars or selling drugs do you? I aint saying there aint a few wack jobs out there, who are stupid enough to do all that, but for the most part people don’t go around doing that.

A lot of who I am today, my values, my beliefs, my character I credit to television and games. Especially during the 6 months holiday I got after I finished my O’ levels, I watched and played a lot, and I mean a LOT, and I still do. And I will have to say, they didn’t rot my mind or make my behavior worse. They made me think more, and made me a better person. They inspired me. Even from movies that had all these criminals as heroes, I saw many important things such as standing up for your friends, looking after your family, courage. And especially from those really inspirations films I saw honor, doing the right thing, patriotism, freedom. Even from games you do learn so much, all you have to know is where to look. I see that working hard pays of, and that bad guys always generally lose:P, and to keep fighting for what you believe in, never giving up and so much more. Well ya there are some games like GTA, which really doesn’t portray anything good, (But are as fun as hell to play :D) but I still don’t think even those games lead to violence. We are who we are, we are brought up by our parents and society, who are given the job of teaching us right and wrong, and once that foundation is solidly laid, you can watch a thousand indecent movies or play a hundred violent games, and it wouldn’t change a damn thing .

“I would burn in hell to keep you safe”
-One of my favorite lines from The Godfather movies, which Michael Corleone tells his daughter-

Winning, Changes Everything!!!

2008-06-16T01:48:00.000-07:00

14th June 2008 will surely be known as the most important date of 2008. Maybe even the most important date of many years to come. After more than 15 years of trying and failing, our boys finally did it, they brought home the gold!!!!

I've never been much of a football fan. I almost fell asleep at the first Maldives match of the SAFF championship. The only reason I didn’t was because I was at the stadium...and they were shouting real loud....who can sleep with them making such a racket huh?

And even in the final match, when people were making teams to watch football together, I got left out. Well I don’t really blame anyone; even I thought I would just be the party crasher at any football gathering. But even staying home alone, watching a little of the match...and chatting online a little....I was really psyched watching the match. I mean after all it was my country's team playing. Luckily I was watching the match when "2 kilo" scored the winning goal. The whole city exploded. Screams and drums could be herd all around. Even I shouted, even all alone in the sitting room. And when the match was finally over.....as my friend Arky said, we herd the true sound of a nation.

Now my misfortune of been all alone at home also meant I didn’t get to see any of the festivities of the night. I still regret that a lot. I hear it was awesome. I even saw a youtube video, I sooo wished I was there.

So the next day I had my fun.

I went out with Arky and his friends, the first part of the evening was a bit slow, but as more and more people started to travel the roads of male' it got more exciting. We walked the roads screaming at by passing motorcycle groups, pick-ups and Lorries filled with people. Finally we decided to go on a ride of our own. Even when my office called, I told them I had a headache...lol....no way I was leaving that fun and going to office. We waited near fizzes and tried to get a vehicle. But we had no luck getting one by calling for one. We waited for like more than half an hour, then finally we saw an empty pick-up coming with just about 6 or so people. We shouted for them to stop. What I saw next was awesome.....It was like a swarm of monkeys...we had like 18 people with us.....and we jumped over the side of a moving pick-up....well most of us did....I had to wait till it stopped hehe...I mean this was my first time even jumping over the side of a pick-up.

Then we travelled the roads of male' screaming and shouting and making various noises with dabiyas, and pot lids. I was one of the people with the loudest voices. We drove around for two hours. It certainly was very fun. We saw people singing on the streets....people dancing (I even jumped of the pick-up and joined the dancing for a while :D)...and even party's. We were screaming things like "mee aharemenge faharey, thangadey ah saabahey, 2 kilo ah saabahey, we are the champions, and even singing some songs....some that weren’t even related top football. It was all about making noise. By the time I came back home it was 11Pm and my voice was a bit sore.

I always thought our football team didn't have much in them. But they have certainly proved me wrong :D....they are now the heroes of the nation, everyone is praising them, pledging gifts to them. I'm also really happy they won. This is one of the most awesome things that have happened in a long time.

A most great thank you and congratulations from me to the Maldives national football team. You have united this nation as one, and have made us forget about our petty differences.

Lets keep This Up Shall we?

P.S. I know this will probably be the most common topic of posting these days, but I just had to post on this topic too. we beat this areas super power, both in football and many other ways. So no way even I, who almost fell asleep at the stadium, could miss writing about it.

Just Temporary.....

2008-06-16T01:07:00.001-07:00

As some of you may know, I have been telling for a while that I am going to make my own site. I started and found that making one wasnt as easy as I thought it would be...xD. Especially without my VERY own computer I can look after on my own and sit at for as long as I want.

Well I still havent given up on making my website, I should get an awesome high powerd laptop by next month:D....then I should be able to work on that.

I was reading some blogs and I thought I really wanted to make one of my own. I did not really like my previous one any more so I decided to make a new one. I dont know what I will do with this once I make my website, but most likley this blog is just temporary...I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

Unlike the last blog in wich I wrote only my views, this time its gonna be my experiences as well as my views....I hope all of you finds something interesting here:)

And ya....I am pissed that it got Krimsonsolace with a K....some pinky b**** stole crimsonsolace.....and she hasn't even put anything on it:@

Well anyway lets see how this goes...

P.S. I've been re-watching my favourite anime Full Metal Alchemist, so I thought I would put something from it.